The School Bus

I will drive pass two primary schools on my way from work everyday. If my timing is off, I will be passing them right after the school session ends. This is when my patience is often tested.

I understand the needs for parents to pick up their children due to the expensive charge of school buses or private cars. However, when these parents takes up 2 out of 3 lanes of the road, it gets pretty darn annoying. Thanks to them, my (and other drivers too) journey home would be delayed. On some days, we would be stationary for a good 5 minutes while waiting for someone to move his or her car!

Anyway, sometimes I do think of the valuable life experiences that these kids are missing.

Throughout my primary and early secondary school years, I took the school bus to school. I made friends (or not) with other children from many different schools. We had kids from Chinese, Indian, co-ed and non co-ed schools. So at times, you need to adapt and tolerate with the different type of behaviors just to maintain some peace in the bus. That was an education by itself!

In primary school, I had to walk across our big school field just to get to the bus. And if it rains, I would have to run across it eventhough I would still be soaking wet when I board the bus. Well, when you were young, you would rather be wet than being seen under an umbrella, right?

When I was thirteen; I had a crush on a boy. Yes, it was a Chinese boy. In the bus, I would always catch him looking at me and we would be exchanging smiles. Being young, we were just to shy to speak to each other. Gosh, that went on for a while. I eventually got a nice valentine card from him too! However, nothing happens after that. I guess that is why we call it a crush! :-)

Anyways, while we are talking about guys, I recently 'bumped' into another guy I knew from the 'school bus' days while I was browsing FB, boy, he sure is a lot taller now!

I also had a few embarrassing incidents in the school bus. I had a few ‘bocor’ incidents too! You know, back in those days, I just used any ‘capalang’ brand of sanitary pads supplied by my mom. I was not fortunate to use “Whispers” or “Stayfree” back then. :-(

I also had a few fights with the kids too especially with those from the Chinese schools. Over what, you might ask? Oh, silly matters really. It could be because I asked our driver to play English songs instead of Cantonese songs or I opened the window too low and they wanted it closed shut so not to spoilt their already 'gel' harden hair. :-p

Anyways, the fun part was, as it was the 80’s, while we waited for the buses; the older boys would be showing off with their break dancing skills. That was truly hilarious!

These are surely much more fun and useful life fulfilling experience than playing PS2 while your mom or dad is driving you home!

Do we really need that Jimmy Choos?

I am always amazed at how some people are willing to part with a huge sum of money just to get those Jimmy Choo’s shoes. I also wonder what make those shoes so darn expensive anyway. If you want comfortable shoes, I am sure you could find a pair that will not cost as much as JC’s but is just as comfortable. Besides, even when I see them on the celebs, they still do not look that comfy.

Anyway, people say that as we progress in life, we need to pamper ourselves but honestly; do we really need to buy all these expensive things? Do we really need to buy those RM1200 shoes to make us happy? It is a truly sad day if ever my happiness would be determine on what shoes I am wearing.

I do not need a JC to make me happy. A chat with an old friend will do. Having a nice meal with my loved ones will do it too. Even laying in bed with a good book will have me smiling too.

Life is short. Make it a memorable one. A pair of shoes will not miss you when you are gone but your loved ones will.

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

I have read hundreds of books but none touched me the way this book does. It was such a good read that I finished reading the book in 1 day. Plus, I have never cried so much reading a fictional novel as I did this one.

So, go and read it so we can talk about it! For the ladies, make sure you have a tissue box within your reach because you will need it, trust me!

My entries are too serious

That was the comments from my two dear friends last week. I bet you guys thought the same too.. hehe.. Oh well, this is how I write, people. Let us leave the funny stuff to Nen and Bob, ok?!

Believe me when I say, I tried hard to write about something light. Tapi tak da idea lah..

Apa nak tulis ek? Hmm… Nantilah when I have something ‘light’ I write lah.. but for now, let me write the heavy2 stuff (barulah sesuai with my body mass!)

KIMI

I have always love cats. In the past, we always had stray cats around the house but we never took them in. Last year, we took in our neighbour’s kittens after their mummy died of a tragic death. Sadly, one of the kittens also died about a week later. We buried him in front of the house. Adik even shed a tear for the poor soul, as she was the one who nursed the sick kitten. The surviving kitten, we named him Kimi. Oh, how we all loved that cat. He was very handsome and smart too. We also took him everywhere in the car. He would be restless at first but once he gets motion sickness, he will just doze off.

I remember, one night while Adik was playing with him, he suddenly looked weak and looked as if he could not breathe. So, we drove all the way to the animal clinic in Jalan Pahang for an emergency check up! After taking a jab from the Dr, he was all fine again.

I could also still picture him running down the small hill in front of my house whenever I call upon him in the evenings. He would emerge out of the bushes and you would spot his orange head, first!

Our neighbor also loved him. Some days, Uncle Mansor would take him and played with him for a bit. Kimi also used to hang around in Uncle Mansor’s house. He would walk up and down the stairs as if it was his house too. Well, that was until his wife closed the door on Kimi! I guess she was not too fancy over this furry animal.

Kimi went walking one evening in April and never came back. That morning, before going to work, I held him for a while and when I put him down and said goodbye, he stared at me until I closed the door between us. Maybe he was saying his goodbye to me then.

We prayed for his safe return. We looked for him everywhere. I made flyers and distibuted it around the neighborhood. Sadly, we had no luck. It was just as if he had walked off from the face of this earth. To us, even if we only found his body, we would be grateful. At least we could give him a proper burial he rightly deserved and we would have our closure.

So, even though I have 2 new cats today (will write about them later), at times, I still think of Kimi. He was just special to us. He gave us much laughter and happiness. I hope we will meet again in the world after. Insyallah..

Act of Selfishness

A friend shared a problem with me today. One of his girl friends is pregnant and the father of the child refuses to marry her. So I asked, why does this man refuse to marry? Well, she is not the type he is looking for and my friend commented that these two are just wrong for each other.

My friend questioned me on what good is it to marry someone you do not love. "It is just a perfect recipe for disaster" he said. “Cause it would be a responsible thing to do”, I said. “Even to be divorce later?” he asked. Well, who are we to say that it will get to that? We do not know of God’s plan. We cannot predict the future. We are mere mortals. We are not God.

Later, I found out that she does not want to marry him either. So go figure! All my aggravation was for nothing!

Apparently, these two people know each other for along time. This act of screwing around is a normal habit for them. Astaghfirullah. Then, all I say is that this could be a wake up call from God Al Mighty for these two morons.

She wants to abort the pregnancy while he promised he would support the kid financially to save the pregnancy. To him, as long as he is willing to support her financially, there shouldn't be any reason for her to abort the pregnancy. What a joke, I quietly said to myself. These two are purely selfish in their actions. I wonder how they could both sleep at night. Could she sleep after she aborted the pregnancy knowing that she terminated a life or could he, knowing that he has fathered a child out of wedlock?

Anyway, yesterday a friend commented on an article she read about a father who raped his own daughter. That is another act of selfishness. How a father could force himself on his own flesh? This is sheer devil in action.

If only human beings could stop and think of the repercussions of their selfish actions, this world would be a much better place to live in. Oh, they should not forget about the world hereafter. Everything you do in this world will come back to haunt you in the afterworld. Nothing escapes God Al Mighty.

When The Chef Is Out

I am not much of a cook. All my dear friends could attest to that. But, although I hardly ever cooked in the past, these days I will try to cook whenever the kitchen is available. After all, an amateur like me cannot really cook when the master chef aka my mom is around, right?

So today, as I had the house to myself, I planned to cook. Nothing fancy (amateur, remember?), I was planning to make chicken stew and fish sambal. Therefore, after I surf the net for the recipe, I went to the sundry shop to get all the ingredients.

The result? I would say I am satisfied with my sambal but my chicken stew became chicken soup instead!! Hahaha… The very clever old me, defies the recipe instruction to add 2 cups of water to the mix and instead I added 4 cups! So of course, my stew became soup! However, it tasted great - to me la … Let’s wait for the verdict from the rest, later, ok?

Lesson learnt, I need to stick to the recipe and do not be a smart ass! :p

Be Thankful

As humans, we often take life for granted. Due to our busy life, we go about doing our business almost like the emotionless robot. We often fail to appreciate the small things in life and we tend to forget to be thankful for what we have. When we do sit to enjoy the fruits of our success, we often felt that it is a direct result of our years of hard work.

However, do we ever think of those angels who had helped and supported us along the way? Do we ever thank them for it? Do we even remember their names?

I have been very blessed throughout my working life. At 19, my first job was as an accounts clerk at Johnson & Johnson Medical. As the youngest one there, I had many mentors who thought me the ropes. I learned how to do basic accounting, how to write or print cheques, how to correctly converse with customers and many more. Most importantly, I learn how do use the computer.

When I started working with Mesiniaga in 1995, I had to use the typewriter to issue out the company’s purchase orders. As it was the first time for me to use it, I spoilt so many copies of the forms initially. It was a carbon copy form, so I had to use a new form each time I made an mistake in typing. I was so afraid of loosing my job over this.:-)

The past 16 years has been a wonderful journey.

Looking back, I could see an 18-year-old girl holding her SPM results standing at the bus stop in front of her school, wondering what to do next. The one thing I can tell you now is that never in a million years would she dare to dream of achieving as much as she has today.

Therefore, I am truly thankful for all the guidance and help that I got along the way. I learned valuable work as well as life lessons. I made some life long friendships too.

For these gifts, I am thankful to Allah for all His blessing and I am thankful to everyone who had helped me along the way.

Got this in my email today..

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..
a youth she's content to leave behind....


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a feeling of control over her destiny...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to fall in love without losing herself..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table... or a charming inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she can and can't accomplish in a day... a month...and a year...

When people say…

When we were younger, we used to listen to everything that the older folks tell us. “Do not play outside when it’s hot.”, “Do not take a bath immediately after returning home from the playground.” and “Do not go to bed immediately after a meal.” We obediently listened and obeyed without raising the question why.

When we were younger, we always look up to our parents or the people around us for guidance or affirmations on the things we do daily. The smiles were wide and the sense of pride ran deep in our hearts when compliments were given over things we did based on the guidance given.

However, as we get older, we tend not to listen well and because of that, we tend to get hurt time and time again. Somehow, as we are older, we felt that it is not important to listen to other people’s guidance, advice or opinions. We often felt that we are well equipped and strong enough to go through life without them.

I fell for a guy. Over the years, people around me kept saying (either subtly or to my face) that he is not the right one but I choose to ignore them. How would they know? They didn’t know him. They didn’t spent time with him like I did. They didn’t talk to him as much as I did. So, how would they know he’s not the right one?

But today, with my head held up high, I face the reality. I felt a tug in my heart telling me that whatever dream that I once had about us is never going to be a reality. And although it pains me, it is really time for me to move on. I harbor no bad feelings towards him as he had never said or promised me anything. It was just the plain silly, romantic and sentimental old me that went beyond what it really was.

As I am a firm believer of everything happens for a reason – this one tells me that HE has better plan in place for me...

The week that passed...

It’s been a long week for me. Not having much to do in the office make my time at work seems extremely long. Thank god for chat tools for I spent most of my time chatting with friends. Yes, I am guilty of that but its not like I have other things to do. :-p

I've been feeling agitated and irritable this week too. It's like I have this huge rock inside of me that's pulling me down. Sometimes it feels as if I am drowning. Maybe I would feel better if I scream all my frustration away. Could you find me a sound proof room, please?

I am tired to always have to pick up someone’s slack. For always being the fall back person. The one everybody can depend on. Sometimes I quietly wish that I could just drop everything off my back and say to hell with it all!! I just don't seem to have the patience, the energy and the perseverance that I once have. As my status in FB today states, ‘screw it!!’ haha..

Having the clouds pouring its guts out on most of the evenings this week doesn't help too. I know rain is a blessed sign from Allah but getting stuck for hours in crawling traffic amidst the selfish and crazy KL drivers is a real test to one's patience, especially when you drive in a manual car such as mine. This is why I am thinking of changing to an automatic car. It’s a good time to sell my Iswara as the buying price currently matched the balance of my bank loan. However, having a new car would mean more expenses and with the recession looming, I am not sure if it is a good move. But if I don’t sell off the car now, its value will drop lower than my loan balance in a few months time. So guys, I am in a dilemma... Please help me to decide.

And here's to hoping that the weekend will bring more laughter in my life. God knows how much I need it.

In The Next 5 months..

I will

1. have more 'me' time (to do my reading, writing, to travel or hang out w friends)
2. loose 5kg
3. run 2 donation drive (in dec 08 & mac 09)
4. save some $$ (hopefully will be enough for me to perform my umrah)

hmm... i actually wanted to have 5 things to target for but can't really come up with the last one right now.. so let's concentrate on these for now..

wish me luck guys! ;-p

This Hari Raya

This is the first raya where we celebrated without one of my sisters. Kakak who got married in May had to celebrate Raya in JB as her hubby is put on stand by by the arm forces. It felt kind of strange to me and I am sure the whole family felt it too.

This is also the first raya where we didn't make any baju raya for ourselves. The plan was to wear our cream coloured kurung which we made for Kakak's wedding. Even though I was fine with it before but when the actual day came, it just felt weird to me.

We also broke one of the family traditions - we didn't take any family raya photos..

That's why this raya feels a bit off for me..

Hopefully, in the next 25 days to come, it will get better..


Everything happens for a reason - this one tells me to make sure I have a new baju kurung for Hari Raya - no matter what! hehe...

The Act of Forgiveness

Hari Raya is always said to be the day that we ask/seek for forgiveness for all our wrong doings in the past year. I for one am a person who seeks forgiveness easily and I often cry when I do so. I get laughed at by my sisters when I cry while I salam my parents. heck.. I even cry when my younger sisters salam me. That's just me being the big old crying lady!

Anyway, sometimes I wonder, when we ask for forgiveness, are we really granted one? Or is it just merely an act? Has it become a mere routine during Hari Raya that we say "Maaf Zahir Batin" when we shook hands with our family and friends? Did we really mean it? And do we really forgive the person who is asking for it and are we really forgiven?

So with my mom, I always make sure I asked, "mak ampunkan ye" and make sure she said "Ye, mak ampunkan". Being unmarried, my heaven is supposedly to be under my mom's feet so as long as my mom's has forgiven me, I feel like the doors of heaven has opened up for me. :-)

Forgiving someone is a tall order. For some, it is easily given while some find it hard to forgive. For the latter, I wonder if they themselves have never sought for other's forgiveness. Are they a form of a higher being that never made any mistakes in their lives? For us as the servants of Allah, surely at one time or another had hurt some one's feeling. We surely had 'step on some one's tail" or "jerk some one's chains" So it just bewildered me to see how some people could hold on to grudges for years and does not grant forgiveness no matter how many times forgiveness is seek upon.

As we live in this world on such borrowed time, it is important that we seek and grant forgiveness whenever it is deemed or seek upon. Remember, Allah loves those who forgives and make amends.